Staying present in your life when it’s busy
How are you at staying present in your life when it’s busy? For most of us, it’s easy to stay present when life is going smoothly, but not so easy when we’re too busy.
But staying present is especially important when we’re busy! If we’re not diligent, we give up our calm. Worse yet, we pause the work of growing into better versions of ourselves.
When the pace picks up, we often forget the definition of mindful, “to be deliberately aware of your body, mind, and feelings in the present moment, in order to create a feeling of calm.” *
Below, we talk about what happens if we don’t stay present in our lives. And, we discuss effective ways to stay present so we can move forward with confidence.
What happens if we don’t stay present?
When we get overwhelmed by our responsibilities and the pace of our schedule, we’re surprisingly predictable. Our natural tendency is to it revert to past, less mindful ways of coping with stress.
For example, I have a long-held tendency to push through, and to pressure myself to try harder and do more, so that I don’t let anyone down. I’ve made progress on these innate tendencies, but when I’m overly busy or tired, what happens? I revert to old habits.
When we let down our guard, soul bullies move in
Are you familiar with soul bullies? These bullies are our own internal voices berating us. Soul bullies tell us that we’re not good enough, that we need to do more, that if we don’t push on we will disappoint those we love.
Soul bullies are inner critics, commenting on our (lack of) ability to navigate changing circumstances and situations. Author and speaker Leeanna Tankersly describes this internal talk as getting “sucker-punched by soul bullies,” (Soul bullies hate transformation
They resist change and try to protect us from it. Tankersly says, “when we get close to something that reminds us of who we really are, reminds us of freedom, the Soul Bullies perk up.” She points out that this work of becoming who we are meant to be is a practice of beginning again, and again, and again. It’s a quiet, gentle rhythm: Paying attention to our lives, recognizing when we are too busy or burdened, and kindly retraining soul bullies. When we intentionally listen to our own hearts, God always reminds us that we are enough, just as we are. We are loved and worthy, by God above, even when we or those around us would tell us otherwise. We know, deeply know, that we’re meant to be whole, not bullied, especially by ourselves. When we’re present and tuned into our experience of life, we recognize the soul bullies for what they are so that we can gently and firmly put them in their place. Bullies seek our attention because they’ve been hurt themselves. Soul bullies are the innermost parts of ourselves crying out for attention, expressing past hurts and humiliations. Their presence is a clue that we need to slow down and acknowledge the hurt places. We need to train them to be kinder, more helpful. We need to teach them to stop bullying so that we can continue doing our good work of change. As we navigate transformation within, we have to be mindful of our internal state of mind as well as our external circumstances. We need to slow down, pay attention, and be more intentional. We have to stay away from anything that pulls us from doing the good work of change. Parker Palmer says this about the pursuit of what Thomas Merton called a hidden wholeness: Afraid that our inner light will be extinguished or our inner darkness exposed, we hide our true identities from each other. In the process we become separated from our own souls. We end up living divided lives, so far removed from the truth we hold within that we cannot know ‘the integrity that comes from being what you are.” Staying present to our lives leads us closer to this “hidden wholeness.” May you stay present to your life even when your life is busy. May you seek and find wholeness in your body, mind and spirit. And may you continue to do the good work of transforming yourself from the inside out and outside in. *(For more information on this definition of mindful, check out Staying present in your life when it’s anything but calm.)Staying present reminds our souls they’re worthy
Staying present when we’re busy is our protection
Our ultimate goal is a whole body, mind and spirit
I love the concept of “soul bullies.” I’d never heard that before. Great post full of important reminders! 🙂
Thanks for the feedback, Jessie. I first heard of soul bullies from Leeana Tankersley and I find it a delightful way to think about self-talk and being kinder to ourselves!