Anchors vary from person to person. But often, anchors include our very deepest values (faith and love); spiritual practices (prayer or meditation); and, soul care practices (deep breathing, walks in nature). Many people also find anchors in creative pursuits (writing, painting, or making something); or in physical activity (walking or running, yoga).

Navigating change without anchors

Navigating change without anchors is much like navigating a boat in the ocean during a storm. We’re rocked by the changes and bounce around without control. As events buffet us around, we feel overwhelmed and uncertain.

During these times, our unconscious brain steps into action with fight, flight or freeze reactions driven from a place of survival. Essentially, our brain senses we’re in danger and jumps into “fix-it” mode without accessing higher-level thinking.

We need anchors to steady us

Anchors steady us and keep us from being tossed in random directions. In particular, Gorman says that in times of change we need “sea anchors,” a powerful type of anchor used in the open ocean to help boats ride out rough seas. These anchors keep the boat facing into the wind so it can ride out the storm without capsizing.

During turbulent seasons of change, we need deep, anchoring practices to stabilize us. These practices enable us to move beyond basic survival responses, calm our anxious nervous systems, and allow us to access higher executive functions.

Anchors steady us while we process change

We need these steadying practices to enable us to begin processing how we will move forward in a season of change. In the book “The Body Keeps the Score,” Bessel Van Der Kok, M.D., writes that the more aware we are of “our subtle sensory, body-based feelings,” the “greater our potential to control our lives.”

We have to slow down enough to recognize what we’re feeling so that we can begin to understand why we feel that way. Our anchors help us return to what we know to be true — and begin to pay attention to the signals our bodies, minds, and hearts are giving us about the change.

What are your anchors?

Most of us have multiple anchors. You’ll likely find several that you return to time and again. It’s important to notice what calms you — and avoid short-term fixes such as numbing your feelings or ignoring your problems.

When I’m navigating change, I use a variety of anchors. As I search for what I know to be true, I return most often to my faith and its grounding practices, walking and observing nature, and seeking out ways to be creative (writing, painting, taking photographs, etc.)

May you find healthy anchors …

Marian Wright Edelman, in her book, The Sea is So Wide and My Boat is So Small, wrote these words:

“God, we have pushed so many of our children into the tumultuous sea of life in small and leaky boats without survival gear and compass.

Forgive us and help them to forgive us.

Help us now to give all our children the anchors of faith and love, the rudders of purpose and hope, the sails of health and education, and the paddles of family and community

to keep them safe and strong when life’s sea gets rough.”

Marian Wright Edelman, The sea is so wide and my boat is so small

Let’s do this, first for ourselves — and then for our children as well!

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